Season 1 — The Golden Boys (2021–2022)
All 56 episodes — Trevor & Tom launch the show, find their bits, welcome the first guests and the Blue Card Intern, chase the Jubilee, and sail a full year to the anniversary special. More seasons coming soon.
The 1972 Carnival Mardi Gras
Trevor and Tom launch the show with dueling first-timer tips, then dive into Carnival's chaotic 1972 origin story: a ship on a sandbar and the first drink of the day.
Season 1 · Ep 2Things to do in Key West
Formal night, deck-chair hogs, and an emergency-toilet-paper packing tip — then a loving tour of Key West, from Hemingway's cats to Kermit's key lime pie.
Season 1 · Ep 3Food on the Mardi Gras
Flying solo, Trevor tours the new Mardi Gras's entire specialty-dining lineup — from Shaq's Big Chicken to Emeril's — with detours into cruise-training gluttony.
Season 1 · Ep 4Secret Decks and Other Underutilized Areas on a Cruise
The complete guide to Carnival's secret decks by ship class — plus empty arcades, the library bar, and a lasagna that made a grown man cry.
Season 1 · Ep 5Our Favorite Rooms and Eateries on the Fun Ships!
Cove balcony or regular? Guy's or the Cucina? The guys rank every room type and eatery they've tried — and accidentally set off your Alexa on the way.
Season 1 · Ep 6The Casino, PVP's and Crazyness in Security!
Tom flies solo: casino tournament strategy, why he swears by a PVP, spreading his father's ashes from the Magic, and the ammo that got him detained.
Season 1 · Ep 7A Chat with Former Carnival Musical Director Zach Lee
A decade-plus Carnival musical director on ship life: long contracts, secret rehearsals disguised as shows, crew-mess survival, and why Alaska will kill you.
Season 1 · Ep 8Dining Choices, What Three Things we would like to see on a Carnival Ship!
Early-dining loyalists pitch Carnival a wishlist — bowling, toilet seatbelts, the return of skeet shooting — and ignite the great hot-dog-is-it-a-sandwich war.
Season 1 · Ep 9Changing Ports and All about the Cheers Package
Trevor books the Jubilee's inaugural cruise, the guys decode the port-change fine print, and the Cheers package gets a full cost-benefit breakdown.
Season 1 · Ep 10A chat with Travel Agency "Have Luggage, Will Travel"
Travel-agent vloggers settle the PVP-vs-agent question, with detours into a 1,300-day cruiser, a 27-Shirley-Temple kid, and a guest ruling on the hot dog debate.
Season 1 · Ep 11Carnival's 50th Birthday & Different Types of Cruises
The Golden Boys toast Carnival's 50th birthday, run down the throwback festivities, and break down every kind of cruise you can book.
Season 1 · Ep 12A Chat with Hypnotist Brenda Kaye
Cruise-ship comedy hypnotist Brenda Kaye shares 13 years of on-stage disasters and the surprisingly serious side of hypnotherapy.
Season 1 · Ep 13A Chat with Charlie's Roatan Tours
The guys go full excursion-mode with Roatan operator Charlie Bowden — sloths, ziplines, rum cake, iguana stew, and independent booking tips.
Season 1 · Ep 14Carnival Boarding Update with Verifly, 50th Birthday Celebrated and Cruise News
A news-heavy catch-up: VeriFly goes fleetwide, bubble tours die, fuel surcharges loom, plus the origin of the warm-cheesecake legend.
Season 1 · Ep 15E Mustar is here to stay!
Flying solo while Tom cruises, Trevor debunks the viral 'e-muster is dead' rumor, eulogizes the scrapped Sensation, and reveals Carnival weddings are back.
Season 1 · Ep 16Should I wear a Speedo for Formal Night???
An April Fools mini-episode: Speedos at formal night, a personal tray of bacon, and Tom out-sexying Ryan Reynolds. Nine minutes of pure Golden Boys nonsense.
Season 1 · Ep 17Thomas Kennedy's Vista Review
Tom returns from a week on the Carnival Vista with a full day-by-day review: hog calls on Lido, a transcendent silent disco, Charlie's Roatan tour, and a dying Belize tender.
Season 1 · Ep 18A Chat with Our Best Friends "Have Luggage Will Travel"
Josh & Amanda of Have Luggage Will Travel return to relive the Vista sailing — monkey attack included — talk travel-agent life, and hatch a small-creator group cruise.
Season 1 · Ep 19How to Maximize your Carnival Vacation
A practical top-ten for squeezing everything out of a Carnival cruise — cry-worthy lasagna, theme nights, ropes courses — plus the launch of both hosts' YouTube channels.
Season 1 · Ep 20Should 18 year olds be allowed on the serenity deck?
The guys debate opening the serenity deck to 18-year-olds, defend John Heald from a rumor-peddling YouTuber, and firm up the small-creator group cruise. Speedo threats intact.
Season 1 · Ep 21Things to do when Cruising To Cozumel
Trevor and a voice-cracking Tom run down everything Cozumel — duty-free, beach clubs, ruins and haggling wins — while dodging a mermaid tease.
Season 1 · Ep 22Our Experences in New Orleans
A gloriously unfiltered New Orleans episode — Bourbon Street chaos, a proposal, beignets at 5 a.m. — plus the debut pitch for the Family Reunion Cruise.
Season 1 · Ep 23The Perks in The VIFP Club
A genuinely useful tier-by-tier guide to Carnival's VIFP program, wrapped in rare-burger outrage, laundry-perk scenarios, and a banana campaign.
Season 1 · Ep 24A Chat with our friend Cheryl Cooper aka SIGCruiser
Cheryl 'SIG Cruiser' Cooper joins to explain solo, introvert and gluten-free cruising with real depth — plus the origin of the melting-cake taste test.
Season 1 · Ep 25The Backpack Adventure - Pier Runners YouTube Preview
Flying solo while Tom recovers, Trevor announces his most unhinged experiment yet — a five-day cruise packed entirely into one backpack.
Season 1 · Ep 26Back from the Carnival Breeze
A half-tipsy hotel-room debrief of the Breeze leg: Progreso's pyramid-church, Cozumel line chaos, and big news on Carnival's food-allergy tablets.
Season 1 · Ep 27THE MERMAID EPISODE
The payoff. Tom finally tells the full story of dipping an unsuspecting mermaid performer in pursuit of a sixth Wall of Fame photo. Instant series canon.
Season 1 · Ep 28Carnival Dream Review by the Platinum Man
Trevor returns from eight days on the Dream as a newly-minted Platinum Man — a guest-services showdown, an Alchemy Bar conquest, and a great free Nassau tour.
Season 1 · Ep 29Wild Kids on Carnival Ships
The hosts wade into Facebook's war on cruise-ship kids with surprising reasonableness — plus sportsbook news, the Ecstasy's farewell, and honey-bun war.
Season 1 · Ep 30A Chat with our friends "Parkers On The Go"
The Parkers finally make it on — honey buns in hand — for travel-advisor real talk, Scarlet Lady impressions, and gleeful coverage of a Carnival Magic brawl.
Season 1 · Ep 31New Ships coming to Carnival
Trevor & Tom break down Carnival's incoming ships — Luminosa, Venezia, Firenze — plus brawl-at-sea news, a fighters-only cruise pitch, and unlicensed stock talk.
Season 1 · Ep 32The Blue Card Intern - Reese Schrimsher
Tattoo artist and cruise virgin Reese Schrimsher joins as the show's Blue Card Intern — fielding hazing, fight-night fashion advice, and his first taste of cult membership.
Season 1 · Ep 33Bonus - May 2022 Carnival Breeze Full Review
A solo bonus recorded live on the Breeze: Trevor reviews the whole sailing — banana cream pie epiphany, a mistimed all-black White Party outfit, and three left behind in Progreso.
Season 1 · Ep 34The Carnival Ship that Never Was!
The guys resurrect Project Pinnacle — the 200,000-ton Carnival mega-ship with a walkable whale tail that never got built — plus Jubilee's keel-laying and a staged on-air quitting.
Season 1 · Ep 35The Cheers Package, Aruba and more!
A practical Cheers-package cost breakdown wrapped in chaos — Aruba beach and rattlesnake plans, otter business cards, and the official Church of Podcastaways cult tier system.
Season 1 · Ep 36Carnival Testing Changes
Carnival drops testing for many short cruises — cue Jamaica shakedown tales, a plan to sting the port trinket cartel, and homicidal humpback whale news.
Season 1 · Ep 37Live with our Friends "Have Luggage Will Travel"
The boys guest on Have Luggage Will Travel's live and hijack it — origin story, gelato-gate canon, burrito litigation, and full family-reunion scheming.
Season 1 · Ep 38Quite the Rigamaroo
Mandates drop and Carnival sells out for years — delivered through insurance drama, poll-rigging campaigns, and Trevor's doomed crusade for 'rigamaroo.'
Season 1 · Ep 3930 Day Cruise on the Carnival Luminosa
Carnival's longest sailing ever — a 30-day Seattle-to-Australia epic — sparks cruise-bum fantasies, a mispronounced Cucina menu tour, and etiquette drills.
Season 1 · Ep 40Carnival's Youth Programs told by the Experts
Gold-card lifers Trent and Addy 'Granny' Hayes give the insider review of Carnival's kids' programs, plus a Shirley Temple challenge and a merch meltdown.
Season 1 · Ep 41Carnival Echo Offers and lots of Cruise News!
The crew breaks in their new soundboard studio, contests the funniest-host poll, covers Carnival's Echo casino tier and 1 AM kids' curfew, and launches SpeakPipe.
Season 1 · Ep 42You got the Q's and we got the A's episode!
The SpeakPipe line opens: callers phone in under multiple identities, 'Betty' propositions Tom, and Reese debuts his History of Cruise Ships segment.
Season 1 · Ep 43Piratecasting - International Talk Like a Pirate Day Bonus Episode
A 14-minute Talk Like a Pirate Day fever dream: the hosts stay in full pirate character, invent parrot-based podcast distribution, and demand a refund.
Season 1 · Ep 44What to do in Galveston.
Reesegate erupts with a full conspiracy manifesto before the crew delivers a practical Galveston port guide: hotels, shuttles, piers, and tourist traps to skip.
Season 1 · Ep 45Trevor abandoned us. Soooo.... Josh is taking his place!
With Trevor at sea outrunning Hurricane Ian, Josh Barmore sits in for Vista grievances, group-cruise pub crawl planning, brisket philosophy, and a Mardi Gras preview.
Season 1 · Ep 46Hurricane Ian, The Best Guys Burger and so much more!
Trevor returns from the last ship out of the Gulf before Hurricane Ian with a Valor and Chichén Itzá report, the group crowns the best Guys Burger, and BLT-gate.
Season 1 · Ep 47Reese is back! Carnival Mask Rules, Poll results, and so much more!
Reese returns from the dead sounding suspiciously polite, Tom unveils the Ravioli, crew masks come off fleet-wide, and the crew starts tracking the Ecstasy.
Season 1 · Ep 48Carnival Ends Pre-purchase Bottles of Liquor and lots more!
COVID testing ends for most sailings and Carnival kills stateroom liquor pre-purchase — cue a money-grab debate — before the big one: New Orleans vs. Galveston.
Season 1 · Ep 49Food Price Hikes and NO MORE 24 HOUR ICE CREAM!
Priority boarding returns, dining prices climb, and Carnival kills 24-hour ice cream — triggering Tom's finest on-air grief spiral — plus Reese's first history segment.
Season 1 · Ep 50Carnival's Flamin Hot Pizza!
A pizza-oven fire on the brand-new Celebration, a couple sued off a ship for very loud romance, and the debut of Family Reunion Group Cruise 2.
Season 1 · Ep 51Thanksgiving and Faster to the Fun's return!
A cozy two-man Thanksgiving-week show: Faster to the Fun returns, the boys read Carnival's holiday menu typos aloud, and absent Reese phones in an ironic history lesson.
Season 1 · Ep 52The #CCP Thanksgiving Special
Tom skips his favorite holiday, so Trevor and a possibly-duct-taped Reese host a Thanksgiving clip show: mermaid confessions, the Long Island Iced Tea clamshell incident, and lobster economics.
Season 1 · Ep 53Getting Married on a Cruise, Man Overboard and Much more
A miracle man-overboard rescue meets Trevor's warts-and-all guide to getting married on a Carnival ship — open bar, a vetoed first dance, and a best man who nearly got jailed.
Season 1 · Ep 54Galveston Getaways: The Best (and not best) Hotels on the Island
The definitive (and traumatized) Galveston hotel guide, from the $39 Rosenberg Motel to the Galvez, plus crab-pot and Roomba questions and the full kraken-submarine proposal story.
Season 1 · Ep 55One Year Anniversary Special with the Golden Boys: Cruise News, Facebook Live Event, and Grandma's Birthday Celebration
One year of Podcastaways: a rigged 'funniest host' poll, a $25 bribe confession, Vista dry-dock news, Tom versus Mexican-Italian fusion, and live-show planning on the fly.
Season 1 · Ep 56Q&A with the Cult: All Your Cruising Questions Answered!
The one-year anniversary Facebook Live, warts and all: seven loyal cult members, flying deck furniture, six-toed cats, and a Shaq-and-Heald dream-guest wishlist with zero editing.
Season 2 — Reese Joins the Crew (2022–2023)
All 46 episodes — Reese Schrimsher settles in as the third voice, the crew sails the Family Reunion Group Cruise on the Carnival Celebration, chases the Jubilee, and argues whether a hot dog is a taco. From the New Year kickoff to the Thankmas finale.
Season 2 Kickoff: Cruising in the New Year
The Golden Crew rings in Season 2 the day after Christmas — chasing dream destinations, swapping cursed cruise stories, and one TSA run-in you won't forget.
Season 2 · Ep 2The Podcastaways are Headed to Aruba
Aruba on the horizon: catamaran sunsets, shipwreck dives, metal detecting, aloe factories, an ostrich farm nobody should ride, and a raft-based boarding scheme.
Season 2 · Ep 3Lets talk about CCL increasing gratuities and Wi-Fi fees
Carnival bumps gratuities and Wi-Fi fees, and the crew defends the crew's raise, compares every line, and fields a homeschool request — plus a fake Reese call.
Season 2 · Ep 4Cruise Debate: Bolt Rollercoaster vs Water Slides vs Ropes Course
The whole crew reunites to settle the great onboard-thrill debate, then wanders into duck-hunt culture and Tom's legendary blackjack-tournament run.
Season 2 · Ep 5Rolling the Dice on a Carnival Ship: Gambling on a Cruise
The crew bets big — why Nassau ranked near the bottom, a genuinely useful craps crash course, and the eternal is-a-hot-dog-a-sandwich war reignites.
Season 2 · Ep 6Carnival Cruise News 2/1/23 - Sailing into the Future: Carnival Cruise Line's New Itineraries for 2024
The first-ever Crews News bulletin: Trevor solo on Carnival's please-behave advisory, a record $3.5M St. Jude haul, and jaw-dropping 2024 itineraries.
Season 2 · Ep 7We can still Party!
A tender dedication gives way to a joyful defense of dancing past 30, sparked by a 22-year-old's plea to ban 'old people' from the ship nightclub.
Season 2 · Ep 8Cruising with the Mannings: Family Reunion Edition
The Traveling Mannings join for a rowdy pre-group-cruise hangout: top-five cocktails, the breakfast-burrito war, and a drunk 'Spider-Man' banned for life.
Season 2 · Ep 9Thomas and Reese Hold Down the Fort: A Deep Dive into Online Trolling, This Week's Cruise News.
With Trevor out sick, Tom and Reese clap back at trolls, tour the repainted Carnival Elation, and detour hard into scuba gear and Oklahoma catfish noodling.
Season 2 · Ep 10Cruising Smarter, Not Harder: Tips and Tricks for Your Next Carnival Cruise
The full trio reunites for a port-day playbook — taxi-fare recon, love-locks, camo bans, and never book a flight before 1pm — plus Shaq officiating vow renewals.
Season 2 · Ep 11Smooth Sailing: Mastering Your Carnival Sign and Sail Account
Reese is back and milking his sick day, Guy Fieri tequila hits the fleet, and the guys break down every Carnival Sign and Sail account type.
Season 2 · Ep 12Exploring Aruba with Tour Guide Sammy Giel: From Local Cuisine to Hidden Gems
Aruba local Sammy Giel hands the Golden Crew the real playbook: hidden caves, mom-and-pop kitchens, why Eagle Beach beats Palm, and booking tours right.
Season 2 · Ep 13Let's Go on an Adventure with Hyro in Aruba
Aruba YouTuber Hyro brings the island's soul to the mic before the crew derails into a Sexy Cruiser scandal, an on-air resurrection, and a 21-pound win.
Season 2 · Ep 14The Packing List 2.0
Trevor and Tom riff on retirement-home loofah codes and liberated deck chairs, then deliver a genuinely handy cruise Packing List 2.0.
Season 2 · Ep 15Pack-and-Go Cruise vs Booking in Advance.
The Golden Crew weighs booking way ahead against the last-minute pack-and-go gamble, with a $10 miracle fare and a genuinely warm sign-off.
Season 2 · Ep 16LIVE Announcment
A quick heads-up from Trevor: the Golden Crew is going live Monday nights on Facebook and YouTube — and the regular podcast feed rolls on.
Season 2 · Ep 17Family Reunion Group Cruise 2.0 and MORE!
The crew announces a second family reunion cruise aboard the Jubilee, christens the Children of the Iceberg after-show, and debates John Heald's coffee makers.
Season 2 · Ep 18Curious about Curaçao, News and more!
A possibly-cursed music box, a deep Curaçao port dive with infinity beaches and a swinging bridge, a Titanic history lesson, and a Guy's Burger poll upset.
Season 2 · Ep 19True Crime on Cruise Ships
ChatGPT imagines cruising in 50 years before the crew digs into the real true-crime numbers at sea — and teases Trevor's new spin-off, Dark Waters.
Season 2 · Ep 20Tips and Tricks - The Online Check-in Process
How to snag the earliest Carnival check-in time, the Jubilee's mermaid-and-boardwalk themed zones, and superfan Bobby accidentally breaking the livestream.
Season 2 · Ep 21Talking Cruising with Our Good Friends "Have Luggage Will Travel"
A pre-cruise pep rally with the Have Luggage Will Travel crew — Speedo polls, deep-fried fish-butthole ads, and a $10 serenade for Reese.
Season 2 · Ep 22Cruising Alaska and Family Reunion Group Cruise: A Chat with Eddy Huddleston from Huddle Adventures
Eddy Huddleston brings Spirit-class superlatives, an Alaska preview, a locked-bathroom disaster, and a heartfelt tomorrow's-not-promised turn.
Season 2 · Ep 23Carnival Celebration Review: Unraveling the FRGC Cruise Experience with the Golden Boys
Trevor and Tom relive a cursed road trip and crown the Celebration a near-favorite between lasagna tears and a 15-second roller-coaster boost.
Season 2 · Ep 24Post-Celebration Insights: Tips, Tricks, and Today's Top Cruise News
Trevor turns 40, Carnival turns up security with drug dogs and curfews, and a lost dinner seat becomes the scandal of the season — Justice for Josh.
Season 2 · Ep 25Reese Returns! A Carnival Celebration Q&A and Cruise News Update
Reese delivers the verdict every first-timer earns — cruising rules, Sammy's donuts rule harder, and don't you dare drive to Florida.
Season 2 · Ep 26In the NAVY with Trent Hayes & Reese's Celebration Recap
The crew salutes Trent Hayes as he ships off to the Navy, between blocked-port chaos, Carnival's Q2 numbers, and a moped biker gang called the Fedoras.
Season 2 · Ep 27All Aboard for Carnival Jubilee, Cruise News & More!
Failed fire panels, a whiny influencer christened Derek, and a 102-year-old birthday cruiser, before a full tour of every Carnival Jubilee zone.
Season 2 · Ep 28A Taste of Carnival: New Dining and Disabled Cruising Insights
A genuinely useful accessibility primer on ADA staterooms and tender rules, wrapped in a Carnival menu overhaul, a Baby Buddha beard trim, and live-show news.
Season 2 · Ep 29Morning Brews and Podcastaways - Carnival Jubilee, Stateroom Shenanigans and more!
A caffeinated crossover where the Jubilee gets its whale tail, a cabin projector meets Heald's veto, and a Grand Cayman guide detours into stingrays and Hell.
Season 2 · Ep 30Tom is lonely!
With both co-hosts sidelined, Buddha carries the show solo — an 88-degree A/C meltdown, billion-dollar dream cruises, and scattering ashes at sea.
Season 2 · Ep 31Themed Cruises We Would Love!
Tom drags himself off the sick-couch to dream up themed cruises the Golden Crew would book — chocolate, murder-mystery, pirate — plus phantom pigs and a rogue AI chicken.
Season 2 · Ep 32Caught by Drug Dogs and Charging for Pizza?
THC gummies vs. port dogs, a riverboat brawl that turns into a chair-swinging rumble, and the terrifying rumor that cruise pizza might cost money — full crew, fast and blue.
Season 2 · Ep 33Cheers to Glitches and Cruise Terminal Drama: A Solo Adventure with Trevor Shelby
Trevor flies solo at 5 a.m. to untangle the Great Cheers Glitch, referee Galveston’s one-vote terminal drama, and rank every souvenir worth smuggling home.
Season 2 · Ep 34Carnivals Hurricane Response, New Technology and more!
Tom body-slams the cold open, the guys navigate Hurricane Idalia’s port closures, break the news of Reese going part-time, and go full journalist on Celebration Key.
Season 2 · Ep 35Facebook Group Drama and Missing Person onbard a Carnival Ship
A factual, respectful report on a passenger missing from the Carnival Conquest, then the sillier drama of Facebook rumors, with John Heald as the show’s myth-buster.
Season 2 · Ep 36How to Maximize your Carnival Vacation 2.0
The Golden Crew reload their Carnival tip cannon — dollar-store art-auction gifts, seasickness patches, excursion horror stories, and why you should download this podcast.
Season 2 · Ep 37Carnival Cruising on a Strict Budget!
Trevor goes full penny-pinching for a November Galveston run — steakhouse steaks off the MDR menu, novelty sodas hoarded port by port, and a Mexican-Chinese food dare.
Season 2 · Ep 38Carnivals Travel Insurance and Our LIVE Halloween Party!
The guys hype their first-ever live Halloween pirate party, debunk the life-vest crowd, and make travel insurance genuinely entertaining — plus intern Gary earns national-treasure status.
Season 2 · Ep 39Adventures on Roatan Island
The crew tours Roatan without a guide to sugarcoat it — a heart-stopping zip line, a sloth named Grandma, pickpocketing monkeys, and one unforgettable tropical bird.
Season 2 · Ep 40Navigating the Waters of Cruise Planning: From Budgeting to Booking
A soup-to-nuts cruise-planning masterclass — why cruises now cost 40% more than 2019, passport rules, cab-driver shakedowns, ADA rooms, and how to finance it all.
Season 2 · Ep 41Golden Adventures in Key West with Madison the AI Golden Gal
Trevor opens Tom-less before the Golden Boys reunite for a sun-soaked Key West love letter — Kermits pie, the Little White House, and new AI co-host Madison.
Season 2 · Ep 42The Goldenboy's Journey to Jamaica
One shy of 100, the Golden Boys cash in the jelly-beans prank, cover a real Carnival Magic brawl, and give Montego Bay the no-sugarcoating treatment.
Season 2 · Ep 43The “Get Strange Halloween” LIVE event
The Golden Crew goes LIVE for episode 100 with Gary in the chair, Trevor as Guy Fieri, a haunted Queen Mary narration from Madison, and a one-eyed cat.
Season 2 · Ep 44Sailing into Family Fun: The Barmores Share Excitement for the 2024 & 2025 Group Cruises!
Episode 100 party: the Barmores drop by to unveil three Family Reunion Group Cruises, from Galveston's Jubilee to a bucket-list run to Alaska.
Season 2 · Ep 45Adventures and Misadventures: Carnival Vista's last Galveston Trip
Thomas cruises the Vista on a shoestring: a Cozumel tequila-whistle, a nerve-jangling solo stroll in Belize, the hallway-diaper debate, and a new fake holiday.
Season 2 · Ep 46Sailing into Thankmas: A Lighthearted Thanksgiving Special
The Season 2 finale: a gleefully unhinged Thanksgiving special with pardoned-turkey outrage, a made-up cruise-line bidding war, and the launch of Thankmas.
Season 3 — The Golden Crew (2023–2024)
All 50 episodes (plus 3 mid-week bonus news drops) — Gary Manning joins as a full host, Celebration Key is unveiled, the crew sails the second Family Reunion Group Cruise on the Jubilee, and Pencil-Gate, POG juice, and #PJbrunch enter the canon. From the Season 3 kickoff to the Holiday Special finale.
Setting Sail on Season 3: Celebrations, Controversies, and Community
Season 3 sets sail as the guys toast the community, chase a long-shot Jubilee invite, and turn John Heald's pajama-brunch debate into the official #PJbrunch.
Season 3 · Ep 2Omelet Overhaul: The Breakfast Battle Aboard Carnival Cruises!
A packed video-era episode: Gary goes Facebook official, Reese phones in from an Amazon Flex run, and the crew turns Carnival's omelet tweak into #OmeletGate.
Season 3 · Ep 3Brunch Banters and Carnival Updates
The B show that beats the A show — shameless egg puns, Gary's brunch-timing wizardry, and Trevor's girl-math for booking Alaska until the Luminosa lets him down.
Season 3 · Ep 4Carnival Capers: New Year's Eve Countdown with the Golden Boys
A rowdy New Year's Eve special: Trevor debuts as rad dad, the crew launches Two Truths and a Lie, and Madison unveils Carnival's most unnecessary merch.
Season 3 · Ep 5New Year, New Ports: Exploring Uncharted Waters
The crew rings in the new year with metaverse Shaq, a listener who wanted Carnival to refund the weather, dream ports galore, and one man's quest to ride BOLT.
Season 3 · Ep 6Things NOT to do on a Carnival Cruise!
The Golden Boys count down the things you should never do on a Carnival cruise — from skipping the muster drill to $2,100 phone bills and confiscated drones.
Season 3 · Ep 7Carnival's Multi-Billion Ship Order
A rumored $7 billion, four-ship Carnival order sparks talk of all-inclusive dreams, Madison’s wild AI products, and Gary going Facebook-official as host.
Season 3 · Ep 8Tip or Skip: Should you Tip your Porter? and Gift Card Savings on Your Cruise
Should you tip the porter? The crew says yes — then unpacks the AARP gift-card trick that shaves 10% off your cruise, plus more of Madison’s AI gadgets.
Season 3 · Ep 9Celebration Key Unveiled: A New Chapter in Carnival Cruising
Carnival reveals the five portals of Celebration Key, a Jubilee rescues stranded kayakers, and the wristband debate gets heated — plus a Super Bowl vote.
Season 3 · Ep 10Collision Course: Carnival Magic's Pier Incident in Ocho Rios
The Carnival Magic slams a pier in Ocho Rios, a Reddit misbehaving-kid story sparks a code-of-conduct debate, and the crew talk cabin gifts and upgrades.
Season 3 · Ep 11Charting New Waters: Carnival's Exciting Announcement (Ft. Have Luggag will Travel!)
The Golden Boys announce their first-ever group cruise to Alaska, let travel agents Josh and Amanda Barmore hijack the show, and guess Carnival's next mega-ship.
Season 3 · Ep 12The Nude Cruise: Sailing the Seas in the Buff with the Golden Boys
The Golden Boys tackle the annual nude cruise, dismantle chair-hog schemes, and stress-test travel insurance while Tom infiltrates the Platinum party he wasn't invited to.
Season 3 · Ep 13Things TO do on a Carnival Cruise!
The flip side of the what-not-to-do episode: the Golden Boys serve a warm bucket list of everything worth doing at sea, while Gary campaigns for more breakfast burritos.
Season 3 · Ep 14Scooter Sagas: Mobility and Mischief on the High Seas
Scooters take center stage as Carnival cracks down on hallway parking, and Fact or Fiction sees the Golden Boys cheerfully demolish every tired cruise stereotype.
Season 3 · BonusCarnival Cruise News: 3/13/24 Scooter Shuffle and Sea Scoops with Madison
Madison takes the wheel for her first solo Cruise News Corner: the scooter policy crackdown, the Carnival Glory's Spanish glow-up, and an original song.
Season 3 · Ep 15Unveiling 2025's Hidden Carnival Cruise Gems
A treasure map of 2025 sailings from a two-island getaway to a 16-day transatlantic, bookended by Carnival's solar ambitions and why Trevor Shelby hates ice cream.
Season 3 · BonusCarnival Cruise News: A Returning Icon and Big Changes for one Port!
Trevor hands the news desk to Madison: Michelangelo's David sails again on Carnival Firenze, Norfolk becomes a year-round homeport, and a themed-cruise question.
Season 3 · Ep 16Staying Safe in Port and a Warning from Carnival
Trevor and Tom hold down the fort solo while Gary cruises, turning his imaginary buffet-bear run-in into a Law & Order case atop real port-safety tips.
Season 3 · BonusCruise News: Key Bridge Collapse Causes Carnival Detour
Madison steers a careful course: a Carnival Freedom fire with a happy ending, a new XL ship on order, and a respectful account of the Key Bridge tragedy.
Season 3 · Ep 17The Lost Episode
A tiny sorry-the-audio-broke placeholder where Madison refuses to be Madison — under four minutes of pure bit, plus where to find Teresa's Spirit review.
Season 3 · Ep 18The Carnival Sprit Review and More!
The band's back together — Gary returns from the Spirit with a glowing review, a watermelon story, and a new segment where he drinks a two-year-old beer.
Season 3 · Ep 19Carnival Cruises: Falling Behind or Staying True?
The crew's most thoughtful debate in a while — is Carnival resting on its laurels? — wrapped around wheelbarrow bans, Titanic-era law and a Chevette metaphor.
Season 3 · Ep 20Carnivals World Cruise?
A tighter episode with Gary phoning in a French-toast confession, a could-Carnival-do-a-world-cruise thought experiment, and a tender missing-guest turn.
Season 3 · Ep 21Behind the Scenes of CCP
Three failed-podcast veterans reveal how they accidentally built a cruise-comedy institution — a bad origin episode, AI fan-fiction, and Honest Gary.
Season 3 · Ep 22Sailing the High Seas: Tom's Review of the Carnival Jubilee
Tom returns from the Jubilee with rave reviews and one traumatizing fish spa, while Trevor freezes in Alaska and the crew tackles Heald's spiciest complaints.
Season 3 · Ep 23Trevor's Alaskan Escapade: Burritos and Glaciers
Trevor delivers a great Alaska travelogue — glaciers, gold-rush ghosts, burping sea lions — while stubbornly refusing to admit he saw the northern lights.
Season 3 · Ep 24Sailing Through Our Favorite Carnival Ships!
The Golden Crew hands the mic to the community for a warm ship-ranking party — the Splendor runs away with it and one Californian named Jen seems too good to be real.
Season 3 · Ep 25Our Least Favorite (but still FUNtastic) Ships
No such thing as a bad Carnival ship — only overflowing toilets, impossible bathroom stalls, and one very non-Carnival MSC misadventure roasted with love.
Season 3 · Ep 26Navigating Travel with a Disability: Michelle Steiner's Story
Trevor's out with a bad back, so Tom and Gary host a warm chat with guest Michelle Steiner about traveling with a hidden disability, plus stormy cruise news.
Season 3 · Ep 27Truth or Myth? Carnival Cruise Secrets Revealed
A birthday MythBusters showdown: is Carnival food bland? Are the ships just party boats? The Golden Crew bust five cruise myths with roller-rink nostalgia.
Season 3 · Ep 28Our Biggest Cruise Mistakes: Tales from the Golden Boys
The Golden Boys confess their worst cruise blunders — a murder-motel Cars lamp, a frantic pier-run through a condemned Club Med, and passports nearly lost.
Season 3 · Ep 29Carnival's Secret Changes and Royal's Fiery Mishap
The Golden Crew play detective on quietly-dropped Carnival perks, land a John Heald reply, cover Royal's Icon of the Seas fire, and debut a new AITA segment.
Season 3 · Ep 30Hurricane Season Hits: Cruising Through Stormy Waters
Hurricane Beryl hits the Caribbean live on record as the Golden Crew get real answers from Carnival's Miami weather bunker — plus a possible new co-host in Jen.
Season 3 · Ep 31Vaping, Brawls, and Balcony Suites: The Golden Crew Tackle Cruise Controversies
Three drinks in, the Golden Crew turn John Heald's inbox into comedy: a pizza-line brawl, secondhand vape science, and a balcony-suite change of heart.
Season 3 · Ep 32Lights Out Pillow Talk and Bacon Wars: Cruising Controversies Unveiled
With Trevor away and a soda-drowned MacBook, Tom, Jenn, and Gary improvise a gloriously petty episode about night-lights, pillow snobbery, and Bacon Wars.
Season 3 · Ep 33Melanin at Sea: A Rich and Jazzy Life Joins CCP
Rich and Jazz of a rich and jazzy life join the crew for a warm talk on going viral, getting noticed by Disney, exploring Nassau, and the hot-dog debate.
Season 3 · Ep 34Onboard Adventures: Gary’s Tales from FRGC II
Gary phones in live from FRGC II — bear-hugged by fans, floating on Paradise Beach margaritas, and cannonballing into a live stream. A celebratory postcard.
Season 3 · Ep 35Interview with Kyndall Fire: Chicken Strips, Teleportation, and Hot Dog Debates
Carnival Jubilee cruise director Kyndall Fire fields the crew's off-script questions — chicken strips forever, teleportation over stairs, and the breakfast burrito.
Season 3 · Ep 36Cruising Controversies: Sneaky Alcohol and Strict Island Laws
The Golden Crew tackles liquor smuggling, Grand Turk's drug-surrender bin, and the pizza pirate — equal parts travel warning and belly laugh.
Season 3 · Ep 37Embarkation Day Secrets: Insider Tips for Smooth Sailing
The golden boys and girl walk you through embarkation day step by step — countdown-queen packing, Uber-vs-parking hacks, and the salvation of e-muster.
Season 3 · Ep 38Should Gratuities Be Non-Negotiable?
The crew beats the gratuity horse with love — weighing whether Carnival should just bake tips into the price like Australia does, plus a snooty-snoot drama.
Season 3 · Ep 39Carnival Fun Day Secrets: From Embarkation to the First Full Day!
The golden crew breaks down your first fun day at sea — steakhouse wine hacks, aft-elevator escapes, and ship-on-a-stick glory — before Teresa hijacks the show.
Season 3 · Ep 40Port and Debarkation Secrets: The Golden Boys' Cruise Guide
The pure Trevor-and-Gary show — a 40,000-read Reddit confession, John Heald's statue-of-limitations gold, and enough debarkation luggage hacks to make you a snooty-snoot.
Season 3 · Ep 41Cruise Hacks Gone Wrong: Toddler Troubles on the High Seas
With Tom recovering from a stroke, Trevor, Gary, and Jenn tackle a viral toddler-in-the-cabin fiasco, bust the keycard-AC myth, and debate carrying your passport ashore.
Season 3 · Ep 42Celebration Key Secrets: What’s Really Included?
The crew reads the real fine print on Carnival's Celebration Key — your drink package does NOT come ashore — plus Gary's lecture on why ships ban power strips.
Season 3 · Ep 43Cruising Mistakes You'll Only Make ONCE – Avoid This Debit Card Disaster!
Reese busts out of the basement for the three amigos and a cautionary tale — the debit-card hold that froze a guest's four grand — plus Gary's onboard-holds breakdown.
Season 3 · Ep 44Cruise Disaster! The Bridesmaid Who Ruined Everything and Tom's Miraculous Return!
Tom returns in the flesh and the whole Golden Crew piles on for a turduckin of a podcast — a bride's nuked cabin, a news takeover, and a president's charity skydive.
Season 3 · Ep 45Solo Shenanigans: Trevor's Pumpkin Pie Rant & The Infamous Mermaid Story
Left to fly solo, Trevor turns a stripped-down episode into a love letter to the show's roots — from the birth of the golden boys to a squash-pie rant and the Mermaid Story.
Season 3 · Ep 46Pencil-Gate: The Great Carnival Pen Debate
The crew turns a grumpy pencil complaint to John Heald into a constitutional crisis, launches a snooty-snoot hotline, and narrows the group-cruise polls.
Season 3 · Ep 47Revealing the Secret Behind Carnival's Disappearing POG Juice!
POG juice vanishes and the crew hosts a wake, plays an unhinged Two Truths and a Lie, debunks the passport rumor, and debates what a cruise is really worth.
Season 3 · Ep 48Ducking Around: Meet Carnival’s New Quirky Mascot!
Carnival unleashes a giant furry duck and the full crew debuts a diabolical new game daring you to get a funnel tattoo for a free cruise. An 85-minute marathon.
Season 3 · Ep 49Wet and Wild: Pool Mishaps, Games, and Season 4 Sneak Peeks!
Pools get fouled, mics get haunted, and the crew swears a solemn cult oath by the Lido deck — all while teasing Season 4's tropical theme song and Tiki Ted.
Season 3 · Ep 50What Not to Do on a Carnival Cruise: A Holiday Special
The Season 3 finale: a Thanksgiving toast, a time-travel price check, and a hilarious survival guide of everything you should NOT do at sea — plus Season 4 ahead.
Season 4 — The Transition (2024–2025)
All 27 episodes — Jenn Rowell steps up as a full co-host (even carrying "The Tom and Jen Show"), the crew sails FRGC #3 to Alaska on the Luminosa, Celebration Key opens, and the show edges toward its big rebrand from "Carnival Cruising Podcastaways" to simply The Podcastaways.
The Ultimate Insider's Guide to Carnival Secrets
Season 4 launches with three hosts, a $42 Mexico cruise tax scoop, a joyfully unhinged list of Carnival secrets, and Gary phoning in from SpeakPipe land.
Season 4 · Ep 2The Golden Crew's Guide to Affordable Cruising
Gary's back from quitting and the Golden Crew turns pro-frugal — stacking AARP gift cards, cruise cash, and off-peak sailings into a cruise-cheap masterclass.
Season 4 · Ep 3Carnival Venezia Rundown and Review, AARP, Carnival Shops and more
The Golden Crew brings the Venezia trip home — Guy's pepperoni burgers, a server who kept calling Gary Tom, and Trevor buying out Carnival's Heald coasters.
Season 4 · Ep 4Do You Really Need a PVP or Travel Agent? Plus, Elegant Night Drama & Platinum/Diamond Perks!
A practical case for keeping a PVP in your corner, a real warning about fake customer-service scam centers, and all-out war over pineapple on pizza.
Season 4 · Ep 5The Princess Takes the Helm: Jennifer’s Grand Adventure
Jenn files a glowing dispatch from the Grand Princess — medallion magic, bottomless Plus-package drinks, a goat-yoga debate, and Gary in timeout.
Season 4 · Ep 6Secrets, Slides, and Surprises: One-of-a-Kind Carnival Cruise Experiences!
Just Trevor and Tom, a research doc, and a fleet's worth of hidden slides, secret bars, and one-of-a-kind Carnival rides in a warm two-man throwback show.
Season 4 · Ep 7Cruising With Confidence: Accessibility & Adventures with Aspen
Tom, Jenn and Gary welcome disability-travel creator Aspen Sage and service dog Ms. JoJo for a warm, practical guide to accessible cruising.
Season 4 · Ep 8Hidden Ways to Save Money on Your Next Cruise
The full Golden Crew crams around the mics for a marathon money-saving masterclass, from $34 souvenir cups to phantom double-diamond status.
Season 4 · Ep 9The Tom and Jen Show
With Trevor and Gary off on a bromance cruise, Tom and Jenn run a lean half-hour on a $10 shuttle scandal, fresh conch, and casino comps.
Season 4 · Ep 10Dudes, Food & Brews Cruise
Trevor and Tom debrief the Dudes' Cruise: a Shaq-narrated vow renewal gone off-script, hidden Cozumel crew food, and a casino comp worth one ice cream.
Season 4 · Ep 11Towels on Fire & Chocolate Cake Drama: Carnival Cruising Catastrophes
Jenn's back as the crew covers a Carnival Glory balcony towel fire, a ghost-ship photo, melting cake drama, and a diamond-tier demand for extra cake.
Season 4 · Ep 12Miami Party Cruises EXPOSED: The Truth About Short Carnival Cruises!
A contraband French press, Cyclone Alfred freezing Jenn's Wi-Fi, and Gary Manning's best dad joke of the season, all chasing one question about short cruises.
Season 4 · Ep 13The Tom & Jenn Power Hour. AKA Where in the World Is Trevor SanDiego?
Trevor's a silent ghost, so Tom and Jenn take the mics for dogecoin confessions, Tomahawk-steak debate, and sweet advice on making one last cruise count.
Season 4 · Ep 14I Ate Two Cheesecakes and Blame My Mom
Trevor weaponizes a Gandalf soundboard, roasts the Diamond lunch menu, and owns up to eating two cheesecakes, then blames his mom. Plus restaurant rankings.
Season 4 · Ep 15Hold the Ketchup, We’re Texan! Mayo Ain’t Just for Sandwiches, John
With Trevor off the mic, Tom, Gary, and Jenn ride Tim's botched Aussie intro from Duolingo April Fools to Dukes mayo to the Stillwater testicle festival.
Season 4 · Ep 16Platinum Problems & Project Ace: Carnival Updates Revealed
Trevor and Tom go two-man on the Carnival loyalty-program overhaul, the newly named Excel-class ships, and the giant Project Ace reveal, plus a glitter-bomb contest.
Season 4 · Ep 17Banned Booze, Passport Frowns & a Toilet Mystery Solved
Frowny passport photos, banned booze smugglers, a bomb-hoax cautionary tale, and Tim finally solving the great Australian toilet-swirl mystery (clockwise, for the record).
Season 4 · Ep 18Cruise Packing 101: Essentials, Embarrassments, and Expert Tips!
A full cruise-packing masterclass split by category, plus reef-safe sunscreen, Poo-Pourri diplomacy, Trevor bottling his beloved Carnival body wash, and Tom's TSA saga.
Season 4 · Ep 19Powdered Booze, Haunted Ports, and Travel Insurance Truths
Jenn's Long Beach home-port deep dive — Spruce Goose dome and haunted Queen Mary — plus powdered booze, travel-insurance truths, and Trevor's unhinged burial-at-sea wishes.
Season 4 · Ep 20Carnival Goes Digital… and So Did Our Sanity
A raw, no-edit two-man show as Carnival ditches paper excursion tickets, plus a definitely-not-a-scam podcast coin, bourbon show-and-tell, and Australian toilet physics.
Season 4 · Ep 21From Celebration Key to Runway Outtakes: A Carnival Deep Dive
A cited look at Celebration Key's palm trees, jobs, and tour guides before dissolving into COVID mullets, a secret runway-model past, and a Long Islander campaign.
Season 4 · Ep 22Alaska or Bust: Trevor's FGC #3 Adventures on the Carnival Luminosa
Trevor brings the whole Alaska trip home — a hybrid ex-Costa ship, OG burgers beating Guy's, a whale 20 feet off the bow, and a fearless passport gamble.
Season 4 · Ep 23Mess Around and Find Out: Carnival's Social Media Crackdown
Carnival plays mess around and find out with booze smugglers, plus Valor's new water slides, a fake VIP-tier leak fact-checked by Yahoo, and the debut of Kitty Spears.
Season 4 · Ep 24The Golden Crew Goes Red: VIFP Changes Explained (Sort Of)
The Golden Crew mourns Carnival's new spend-based VIFP tiers with a Titanic power ballad, a 30-pin lanyard, and some grim platinum math.
Season 4 · Ep 25From Grief to Acceptance: Planning Our Poop Cruise Watch Party
Trevor works through the stages of grief over the VIFP changes, pitches a Poop Cruise watch party, and drops the first hint of a big change coming in August.
Season 4 · Ep 26Independence Day Special: Fireworks, Pool Noodles, and Happy Endings
A short holiday hang with faked fireworks, a Disney rescue that ends in hugs, a debunked $19.99 pool-noodle rumor, and Tim's tearful first-cruise memory.
Season 4 · Ep 27Breaking: The Podcastaways Set Sail (Plus Tim's Wild Burlesque Adventure)
The finale: the crew drop Carnival from the name to become The Podcastaways, read Celebration Key's menu, and air Tim's unforgettable Cairns burlesque report.
Season 5 — The Podcastaways (2025–present)
The current season — and the big rebrand: "Carnival Cruising Podcastaways" becomes simply The Podcastaways. Trevor, Tom & Jenn settle into the core trio, the show hits its 200th episode and five-year anniversary, and the news never stops. New episodes drop most Saturdays — this list grows as the season sails on.
Welcome to The Podcastaways! (Same Chaos, New Name)
The Podcastaways christen their rebrand with a self-drummed theme song, a tsunami-adjacent Hawaii saga, and a pool-deck faceplant heard round the internet.
Season 5 · Ep 2From Margaritaville to Viking: Our Cruise Line Bucket List
The crew cheats on Carnival on paper — ranking Margaritaville, an MSC butler and a Viking annual pass — while Trevor drops a hockey-romance novel.
Season 5 · Ep 3Waterslide Woes & Diana Ross No-Shows
Diana Ross ghosts a ship christening, Royal outlaws rubber ducks, and a waterslide springs a very literal leak — narrated by one working index finger.
Season 5 · Ep 4From Astronaut Godmothers to Nude Cruises: We Cover It All
A research astronaut sails in as a ship's godmother, MSC waves goodbye to Brooklyn, and the guys map every themed cruise from wrestling to nude.
Season 5 · Ep 5Pack Like a Pro: Our Must-Have Cruise Items
Kayakers declare war on a cruise ship and lose, a waterslide gets its fiberglass glow-up, and the crew hands over their battle-tested packing list.
Season 5 · Ep 6Gift Card Scams, Tattoo Bans & Zero Proof Cheers
Scammers jump ship, Princess bans visible tattoos, two Aussie listeners hijack the feed, and Carnival makes ice cream taste like sunscreen.
Season 5 · Ep 7$37K GoFundMe Scam, Ship Fights & Golden Boys Forever (Plus Kangaroo Updates)
A GoFundMe grifter, a pool-deck brawl that turned a ship around, the eternal glory of the Golden Boys, and fresh kangaroo intel from Tim's block.
Season 5 · Ep 8Missing in Bonaire, Stuck Over the Ocean & The Great Bra Debate
Somebody's stuck in a slide over the open ocean, somebody vanished into Bonaire on purpose, and the great bra-card debate rages on.
Season 5 · Ep 9New Main Dining Charges Surprise Guests & The Podcastaways Meets with HR
The crew reports to HR, knights each other Lords of the Lido, and reckons with a $52 burger and Norwegian's new five-buck second-helping fee.
Season 5 · Ep 10New Disney Theme, John Heald's responds to Ducky Idea
John Heald blesses the great rubber-duck slide race, Disney's newest ship lets you pick the dark side, and Tom gets drafted to serenade the Lido on tuba.
Season 5 · Ep 11Getting the Best Casino Deals with Comp My Cruise!
Trevor, Tom and Jenn welcome comp pro Annie McCone of Comp My Cruise to decode casino cruise comps, where play beats loyalty status and luck rules all.
Season 5 · Ep 12From Lifeboats to Lawsuits: Cruise Chaos Weekly
A promised happy-news week rides from heroic migrant rescues to bed bugs, lawsuits and Carnival's new Lido-deck Bagels at Sea, with a hard 11:30 bagel cutoff.
Season 5 · Ep 13From Rescue Missions to Real Investigations - The Golden Crew Breaks it Down
The Golden Crew tackles an FBI investigation, a sinking excursion catamaran and AI cruise hoaxes on Facebook while Jenn stays frozen mid-sentence the whole show.
Season 5 · Ep 14Runaway Lifeboat, Missing Passengers and The Voice of the Ocean
With Trevor down with COVID, Tom and Jenn cover a runaway lifeboat, a man-overboard search, eight-hour port delays and Jenn's Voice of the Ocean plan.
Season 5 · Ep 15Carnival’s 10-Minute Drink Rule: Buzzkill or Better Safety?
Carnival's stealth 20% tip hike and new 10-minute drink rule get the full crew treatment, plus Reddit saves a honeymoon and Trevor eats crow over a hoax.
Season 5 · Ep 16Overserved at Sea: Drink Limits, Liability, and Passenger Safety
The crew weighs a 33-drink over-serving lawsuit, Meta-glasses etiquette at sea, and Madison's cross-line drink limits — heavier than usual, still full of laughs.
Season 5 · Ep 17Cruise Crystal Ball: The Wild, Weird, and Wonderful Things Coming in 2026
A hot-or-not forecast of every 2026 mega-ship, private island, and hydrogen-powered Hindenburg of the Sea — plus a suspiciously long argument about iced tea.
Season 5 · Ep 18Don’t Be That Cruiser: The Unwritten Rules of Life at Sea
Trevor and Tom ring in 2026 with a field guide to not being that cruiser — muster duty, deck-chair squatters, and the bridge crew who can see you in the dark.
Season 5 · Ep 19Adult-Only Sailings, Cruise Myths & Why Miami Might Be a Mess
A tight two-hander on adults-only sailings, upgrade-fairy fairy tales, and a Miami port morning seven ships probably shouldn't share with a 5K road race.
Season 5 · Ep 20Sing Like a Sailor: Hawaii Cruise Tales and Cat Tech Confessions
Jenn sails home from Hawaii with turtles, an ill-timed volcano, and two karaoke scandals, while Trevor and Tom confess to robot-litter-box surveillance.
Season 5 · Ep 21Carnival Heads to Africa, Snow Hits the Lido, and Other Cruise Curveballs
Trevor's off skating, so Tom and Jenn cover Carnival's move to Africa, a frozen Lido waterfall, NCL's fly-early policy and going MSC-curious.
Season 5 · Ep 22Bottomless Bubbles, Big Feelings, and a Five-Year-Old Cruise Legend
Bubbles and tips creep up, but a five-year-old with 700 loyalty points steals the show — plus Build-A-Bear trauma and a Symphony drug bust.
Season 5 · Ep 23Carnival’s IT Freakout + Royal’s Smart Glasses Crackdown (Plus Skipper!)
Jenn ghosts, so Trevor and Tom cover Carnival's seven-ship IT meltdown, Royal's smart-glasses ban and the network's cutest hire, Chief Dog Officer Skipper.
Season 5 · Ep 24The Ultimate Galveston Port Day Playbook: Seawall Stays, Pier Bars, and Pre-Cruise Chao
A sprawling, milestone Galveston master class — Seawall hotels, Goodwill cruise swag, Waffle House diplomacy, and how not to walk your luggage to the wrong ship.
Season 5 · Ep 25Behind the Curtain on Princess Cruises with Kira Jackson
Kira Jackson pulls back the curtain on her secret life as a fleet-wide Princess bingo character — the mall-Santa illusion, seasick green apples, and too many ducks.
Season 5 · Ep 26Lights Out on the Sunshine, Glow Up on the Conquest & Waffle Cones Are a Hack Now
Trevor rasps back from strep throat as the Carnival Sunshine loses power, the Conquest returns from dry dock shiny, and the crew debates soft-serve waffle cones.
Season 5 · Ep 27The Wildest Things Banned on Cruise Ships
Trevor's straight-faced roll call of everything you can't smuggle aboard — lightsabers, handcuffs, Roombas, upside-down pineapples — plus new Carnival brunch upgrades.
Season 5 · Ep 28Platinum Problems, Balcony Mattresses, and Bobby's Terrible Taste in Chicken
A perfect Jubilee health score, a corned-beef stock crash, and a listener named Bobby who dared to like the fried chicken — plus balcony mattresses and Platinum cutbacks.
Season 5 · Ep 29John Heald's Dog Did Nothing Wrong
Tom pokes the bear about biscuits, John Heald's dog Quantum eats something unspeakable on camera, and the crew plots a Shaq's Big Chicken taste test in a snappy quarter-hour.
Season 5 · Ep 30We Switched to Margaritaville (And Other Lies We Told You)
The Podcastaways' April Fools gag: for one fictional day they 'became' Margaritaville and handed out the single worst cruise advice ever recorded. Please never do any of it.
Season 5 · Ep 31No Bimini, No Beard, No Tom
Trevor and Jenn fly solo for the first time ever — dodging a tornado, defending beluga lentils, and skipping Bimini while Tom's off shaving his beard.
Season 5 · Ep 32Chicken & Waffles, Time Travel & Somebody's Getting Sued for $300K
Babyface Kennedy returns, Carnival tests chicken on waffles, Tim beams powerball numbers from the future, and a $300K tequila lawsuit lands in court.
Season 5 · Ep 335 Years Later: Grading Our First-Ever Cruise Tips
A five-year anniversary victory lap: the crew rewinds to episode one to grade their rookie cruise tips, from comb-over cringe to the $30 drink-cup trap.
Season 5 · Ep 34Opt In, Cruise On: VIFP, Pork Chops & Tom Wants a Tattoo
Tim's future-powerball scheme collapses, a virus story gets a careful hand, and Tom wants ink at sea — so the crew opens the floor for listener tattoo pitches.
Season 5 · Ep 35Perfect Day Denied: Mexico Says No, Cuba Says Pay Up
Mexico rejects Perfect Day, Cuba's Havana docs haunt the industry, and Costa will fine you for a smuggled buffet plate — plus de-magnetized Princess medallions.
Season 5 · Ep 36RelaxAway Half Moon Cay Opens — and Carnival Gets Breached
Half Moon Cay reopens as RelaxAway with a new pier, Carnival confirms a data breach, and Trevor debuts his Free Cruise game — plus a sober excursion story.
Season 5 · Ep 37John Heald Is Evolving — Carnival's Brand Ambassador Steps Back
Carnival's John Heald steps back to evolve his brand-ambassador role as the crew unpacks redesigned loyalty cards, a listener spin-off podcast, and FRGC4.
Season 5 · Ep 38Frightfully Fun: Carnival Goes Spooky Fleet-Wide (Plus a Port Miami Brawl)
Tom's off to Buc-ee's while Trevor and Jenn roll out fleet-wide Halloween cruises, share a peanut-butter melting-cake tip, and referee a Port Miami brawl.
Season 5 · Ep 39Fourth of July Special: Fireworks, Fin Whales, and Ports for Little Kids
A Fourth-of-July special: seven Carnival ships meet at sea for America 250, a carefully handled Alaska fin-whale story, and an honest guide to cruising with kids.